AI don’t want you to be worried, but our son has some bad habits now. He says painful words everyday.
BWhat words? Can you tell me?
AHe says kick mommy, beat mommy, don’t want mommy, very quickly if I do something that he doesn’t like. You know, if I wash his face or change his clothes, things like that.
BHoney, I don’t know what to tell you. Of course Tony is a young child. But do not underestimate his ability to learn and reason.
AYes, but sometimes he is just not reasonable.
BI suggest you treat him with patience, affection, and respect. If he needs to do something, like go to bed, or be washed, etc., please guide or help him to get it done, but lead him with gentleness.
AIt’s easy to say, but I will try.
BMotivate Tony to cooperate by rewarding his good behavior. Do not emphasize punishment for bad moods, etc. Do not threaten him with punishment if he resists the actions you desire.
AI know my parents sometimes threaten to punish him. But this doesn’t work, instead he picks up another bad habit.
APaul, you were also a parent of young kids before. So, can you tell me what you did when your kids didn’t behave very well?
BI know Mark is your only child. You may do it differently from what I did. Sometimes I would tap their hands when they made troubles.
AI do it, too. You know, sometimes when we eat, my child would pull a dish towards him and grab it with his hands and eat. And if it were something he doesn’t like, he would spit it out and throw it into other dishes. He does it very often. I really get mad. I can’t help spank him sometimes.
BAnd what does your husband do?
AMy husband is an American. He criticizes me when I do that. He says that I can’t change a child’s behavior by using force. He is learning what I am doing now.
BBut spoiling a child is not going to do him good either! You’ve got to have patience with him and teach him. It’s not easy, I know. It’s hard.
AYeah. I’m still learning how to control his behavior and my temper. My child is almost two years old, and I’ve learnt the distraction technique when he cries for something.